Joy Behar has spent decades making audiences laugh, but she says the turning point in her life didn’t happen on a stage. It happened in a courtroom.
At 83, the longtime View co-host is reflecting on how her first divorce — painful, destabilizing, and unexpected — became the unlikely spark for her comedy career.
It’s a reminder that reinvention doesn’t always arrive neatly. Sometimes, it shows up when everything else falls apart.
Starting Over at 40
Behar divorced her first husband, Joe Behar, in 1981. She was around 39 or 40 — an age when many people feel their lives are already set.
Instead, she found herself without financial security and without a clear plan. That uncertainty, she says, forced her to try something she might never have attempted otherwise: stand-up comedy.
She has since said that staying married would likely have kept her from taking the risk. Comedy was unstable, grueling, and emotionally exposing — not the kind of career leap you make when comfort is an option.
The Hard Years on Stage
Behar entered the comedy world later than most performers, and she didn’t arrive to applause.
Her early nights were spent chasing stage time at clubs like the Improv and Catch a Rising Star. Crowds were often small. Jokes didn’t always land. Some nights felt like public failure.
But occasionally, something clicked. A laugh broke through. A moment worked. And that was enough to keep her going.
She has described those years as driven by necessity as much as passion. With no safety net, quitting wasn’t really an option.
Marriage, Timing, and Changing Selves
Looking back, Behar believes she married too young — a common choice for her generation, when women often settled down in their early 20s.
Her first marriage didn’t end in explosive conflict. It ended quietly, through boredom and growing in different directions.
That kind of ending, she’s noted, can be confusing and painful in its own way — especially for children.
Her daughter Eva was 11 at the time of the divorce. Behar has acknowledged it was a difficult age, and that the split came as a shock.
Love, Stability, and a Different Chapter
Behar later found long-term stability with Steve Janowitz, whom she has been with since 1982. The couple eventually married in 2011.
By then, Behar’s life — and career — looked very different.
What once felt like a forced leap into uncertainty had become the foundation of a public life in comedy, television, and commentary.
Turning Divorce Into Art
Behar has since revisited her early heartbreak in a deeply personal way.
Her monologue play, My First Ex-Husband, draws on her own story as well as interviews with friends who shared their divorce experiences. Some stories are sad. Many are funny. Most are both.
The production is set to return to the George Street Playhouse in New Brunswick from February 13 to 15, followed by performances in Boston from March 27 to 29.
Behar says the show resonates particularly with women, many of whom tell her it makes them feel less alone.
Why Her Story Still Connects
Behar’s reflection isn’t about celebrating divorce. It’s about acknowledging how life’s disruptions can redirect us — sometimes toward paths we never imagined.
Her story speaks to late bloomers, to people forced to start over, and to anyone who has discovered that security can quietly limit growth.
Not every reinvention is chosen. Some are simply survived. And occasionally, they change everything.
